Me Time

Greetings folks. I know it’s been a while since I’ve made a post and trust me it’s been longer than I would have liked. But I promise I have a valid excuse. I’ve been crazy busy lately and haven’t had the time to get proper sleep and nourishment let alone pen a post. I’m using this as evidence in my campaign for an Administrative Assistant. Not a do-boy/girl, but someone to help me stay organized, on-track and as efficient as humanly possible (and handle my dry-cleaning and feed my Starbucks cravings). However, until that moment comes, I’m stuck juggling work, a social life and wedding planning. Yay me! All work and no play makes The Diplomat a very hard person to deal with (just ask my fiancé), which leads me to the topic of today’s post: make time for yourself.

The last couple of weeks have been crazy, insane, frantic and great. I had a birthday that I spent with the most wonderful woman in the world and the best friends a guy could ask for. My friends are so good to me I wonder why we’re even friends. I had a wonderful time celebrating the event that was CM28 Extravaganza. There was food, drinks, the Mayweather-Cotto fight, the beach, shopping, food and more drinks. We came, we saw and we had fun.

A couple of weeks later I hosted a pageant, met Rick Ross (fellow MCC alumn), had my students nearly bring me to tears, went to an awards show and participated in a live taping of NBC’s Education Town Hall Meeting. When did I sleep you ask? Hardly ever. What was Rick Ross doing at my school? Being a Boss! Does The Diplomat cry? Not if I can help it. Who in their right mind would decide to put me on TV? Good question.

Last week I had the pleasure of hosting the Mr. and Ms. Miami Carol City Senior High pageant. It’s something that I’ve done before and I always look forward to doing whenever I’m asked and I have the time in my schedule. This year, both worked out. I had a great time, but you have no idea how physically draining it is to stand under those bright lights all night, work the crowd and maintain order while hosting a pageant. And since it had been a while since I hosted the pageant I forgot too.

The following day I went out to dinner with some friends and family to celebrate my brother’s girlfriend’s birthday. The food was delicious, we had a great time, and nearly closed the place down.

To help bounce back from the back to back late nights, I decided to take the following day off. A mental health day if you will. The plan was to sleep in, get up and catch up on some work. I actually get more work done when I don’t have to go into the office than when I’m there. When I’m there and people expect me to be there, there’s always something. A fire here, a fire there, a fire everywhere. I wish people would schedule their pyromaniac moments so I could plan around it. As that will never happen, I’m stuck fitting in my work around everyone else.

So step 1 of Operation Stay Home goes to hell in hand basket when my phone begins to go off before 7: 00 a.m. First it’s my fiancé, who’s sure I neglected her because she hasn’t heard from me yet and I didn’t tell her that I was calling in. It’s also my students calling/texting inquiring about my whereabouts and if I was going to make it in. it may sound strange but it’s actually pretty normal. Because I’m pretty regimented in my schedule, everyone who knows me, knows they can pretty much set their watch around my schedule. So if I haven’t been seen or heard from by 7:15 (which is late for me) chances are I’m not coming in or something’s wrong. That morning, my students were even more apprehensive because they had planned a surprise and my absence was ruining it. So I get out of bed and head to school to see what type of trouble they had gotten themselves into. When I walked into my room, imagine my surprise when I saw the spread of bagels, fruit, cupcakes and my favorite Krispy Kreme. If that wasn’t enough the sign on my SmartBoard that read, “Teacher, Mentor, Hero” was touching as well. My students playing “Wind Beneath My Wings” in the background was not helping in my quest to fight back tears. But alas, I accomplished it. It was really, really hard, but I managed to make it through without shedding one.


I was supposed to have breakfast with them and then leave. But when I found out that Rick Ross was stopping by, I couldn’t just leave. I’m a huge fan and of course I wanted to hear what he had to say to the kids. He came to speak to the students about the importance of education and going to college. He even donated some iPads to the school’s College Assistance Program office and some shoes from his new line with Reebok to the track team.


That night I taught night school from 3-6, then headed to an awards show across town that started at 7. I had the honor of attending the Silver Knight Awards Show. It is one of the most prestigious honors a graduating senior in Miami-Dade or Broward county can be bestowed. It’s an award that honors student achievement and community service in 15 different categories. That night we took home 2 Silver Knights and 2 Honorable Mentions. As a former honorable mention in the category of speech, I know just how big of a deal it is just to be nominated, let alone come home with any hardware. What made that night even more special is the fact that two of our winners were my students.


In between all of this I needed to eat, sleep, think and make some important life-altering decisions. I realized that I didn’t have the time. As strange as it sounds, it’s true. I didn’t have the time to sit down and think. Every morning I get up, work out, go to work, do a million and one things (or at least try), go home, work some more, then go to sleep. Wake up and repeat. There’s very little time in between to rest, breathe, or relax.


I pride myself on maintaining a busy schedule, a busy life and making it all work. But by no stretch of the imagination is it easy. By no means do I always enjoy it either. At times, it can wear on me; the constant pressure to perform, to be on, to be great; to be perfect. At times, it can be a bit much to be everything to everyone and feel like there’s no time for me. Sometimes it can be a little overwhelming.


I spend more time helping others with their problems and very little helping myself with my own. Yes, I have problems. However, what I have realized is that I’m no good to anyone else if I’m broken and worn down. It’s the like the pitcher that has cracks. It has no water to pour out because it hasn’t maintained its body. So I’m on a quest now to take better care of myself. I do a decent job physically but could do better. However, where I need the most help is mentally. Admittedly I do a terrible job taking care of myself mentally and emotionally, which partially explains why I’m always tired. However, I’m willing and ready to do better.


It’s admirable to want to help others, but in the quest to help others, we must first take care of ourselves. We are no good to anyone if we are broken. Take some time out to ensure your mental, emotional and spiritual well being. Take time out, alone, to rest, relax and just breathe. When you’re at your best that’s when you can help others be at theirs. Until next time, Stay Up and Be Blessed!

Great Expectations

But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked. Luke 12:48 (NIV)

Greetings folks. Things have been really busy for me lately; at home, work and every place in between. However, one of the things that keeps me motivated is the bible verse referenced above. Unless you’re an avid reader of the bible you’ve probably never heard the verse in its entirety. However, most of us, (saints, sinners and backsliders alike), have heard the common abbreviated quote “To whom much is given much is required.” It’s one I’ve heard frequently throughout my life. Whenever I begin to feel like the weight on my shoulders is too much, many of my friends and family recite this quote as a reminder to “suck it up and deal” because I can handle it.

As of late, I’ve been asking myself the question “How much is too much?” It’s easy for outsiders to tell you what you can and cannot handle when the weight you’re bearing isn’t on their shoulders. It’s easy for others to tell you to stay in the race and to keep running when they’re standing on the sideline in the shade drinking lemonade. At times it feels as though we’re guilt- tripped into continuing the treacherous road we’re travelling because other people say “you can handle it.” What happens when you can’t? Who’s there to tell you to stop, slow down, or take a break? Who’s there to tell you that enough is enough and that maybe you’re shouldering a little too much of the world’s cares? And if they are there, are they any more qualified to make that judgment than the folks telling you to press on?

At some point I came to the realization that the only person competent to make this decision is me. I can’t expect my trainer to tell me the weight on the bar is too heavy. I have to tell him. It’s my body and no one knows my body better than I do. Much is the same for our spiritual/emotional bodies. Often times we expect others to think about us, care about us, and make decisions about our physical, spiritual and emotional mindset. However, they’re not qualified to do so. The most qualified person to make that call is you. You know what you can handle and what you can’t handle. You know what’s too much and what’s not enough. You know when you’ve had your fill and when you can stand to have a little bit more. You alone are in charge of telling the world “enough is enough.” You alone are responsible for flipping the card to red at the churrascaria. You alone are responsible for telling people “no mas.”

By our very own nature we as people are selfish. We don’t always mean to be, but we are. We make decisions based on our wants, needs and desires and the concerns of others are secondary. We do what works best for us, which doesn’t always work for others. Most of the time, the inconvenience that people visit on your life is inadvertent and unintentional. You have to stop and think and ask, why would people stop loading you down with stuff if you never tell them it’s a problem? Why would someone stop offering you chocolate doughnuts if you’ve never told them that you’re allergic to chocolate? The onus is on you to speak up and let your desires be known.

I’m acutely aware of the fact that some people, myself included, view saying “no” as a sign of weakness. Those of us who feel this way tell ourselves, that they bring it to us because we’re the best and the brightest and that they wanted the job done right so they brought it to us. Often times that is true. Being talented and dependable is a gift and a curse. It engenders an unrivaled trust in your ability to make things happen. Get lucky and let the nearly impossible happen and they begin to think you’re David Copperfield. Then they’re coming to you to make magic happen. However, at times it’s all in our heads. Sometimes it’s just a matter of our foolish pride and insecurities that won’t allow us to say “no, stop, or not right now.” But if we don’t say it who will?

Don’t be afraid to say that the extra biscuit is too much. While one extra biscuit at breakfast may not seem like too much now, try doing it every day and see what your waistline has to say about that. Have the courage to stand up and say no. At the end of the day you’re no good to your family, friends, co-workers or yourself, if you’re dead or dying because you’re stressed and over-worked.

If you’ve been blessed with certain talents and abilities you’re compelled to cultivate them and share them with the world. However, you’re not obligated to do so without boundaries; boundaries that only you can set. Until next time, Stay Up and Be Blessed!